Wilderness conflict with outsiders

My last two posts dealt with conflict in the wilderness experience — the times in our lives when we are in an emotionally difficult, disorienting, even depressing phase of existence, often accompanied by feelings of fear and isolation.

I noted that sometimes a conflict in the wilderness is between members of a family or partners in a family business, and is leading to estrangement. Other times, conflict occurs internally as we individually wrestle with God’s plans and intentions, leaving us in an outwardly angry or internally confused state of being.

Conflict also happens with people on the outside of our families or family businesses. This third kind of conflict happens with the Israelites after they realize their failure to trust God. God tells them they will spend 40 years in the wilderness as result of turning from Him, but they don’t accept the judgment. Instead, they try to exit the wilderness. Here’s what happens:

And they rose early in the morning and went up to the heights of the hill country, saying, “Here we are. We will go up to the place that the Lord has promised, for we have sinned.” But Moses said, “Why now are you transgressing the command of the Lord, when that will not succeed? Do not go up, for the Lord is not among you, lest you be struck down before your enemies. For there the Amalekites and the Canaanites are facing you, and you shall fall by the sword. Because you have turned back from following the Lord, the Lord will not be with you.” But they presumed to go up to the heights of the hill country, although neither the ark of the covenant of the Lord nor Moses departed out of the camp. Then the Amalekites and the Canaanites who lived in that hill country came down and defeated them and pursued them, even to Hormah. (Numbers 14:40-45)

The Israelites, desperately wanting to leave the wilderness, believe they can avoid God’s punishment. Moses tells them they can’t, and in fact, they will be defeated if they try. But they don’t heed his warning, and the result is exactly what Moses said it would be. They are trounced by the current inhabitants of the promised land.

In your family or family business, it can feel like people are gunning for you. It might be your competitors. Sometimes it’s a regulatory agency or interest group opposed to your way of doing business. It can even be your neighbor. In the midst of your wilderness experience, when you are trying to keep your family together, repair relationships, find staff, sell products, or manage expenses, you end up spending time, energy, and money battling people who want to take you down. It makes the wilderness experience even more difficult.

Sometimes, it’s hard for us to admit our own behavior may be part of the reason people are out to get us. Our own attitude or actions have contributed to an adversarial situation, or to a battle we have lost.

Have you experienced conflict with outsiders as part of your wilderness experience? How did your behavior affect the escalation, or resolution, of the dispute?