How we take our family for granted

In my last post about The Parable of the Prodigal Son, I contemplated the unlikely act of a father dividing his estate, which includes an ongoing business, at a son’s request. As disappointing as it might have been to the father, he fulfilled his son’s petition. Here is what the son does with his share:

Not many days later, the younger son gathered all he had and took a journey into a far country, and there he squandered his property in reckless living. And when he had spent everything, a severe famine arose in that country, and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to one of the citizens of that country, who sent him into his fields to feed pigs. And he was longing to be fed with the pods that the pigs ate, and no one gave him anything. (Luke 15:13-16)

The son takes his belongings and leaves. He effectively says “good riddance” to his family. He spends all his money and then, perhaps for the first time, has to meet the expectations of someone other than his father or brother in the workplace. He gets a hard dose of reality.

Many themes leap out of this part of the story: The immaturity of the younger son. The lack of saving or planning. Quick reversals of fortunes. The loss of everything. The reality of hard work that still doesn’t provide. The longing for normalcy. But the most compelling theme, to me, is how the son’s behavior reflects a common experience of life in both family and business: taking your loved ones for granted.

The last line of the passage “…and no one gave him anything” is telling. In many respects, the younger son had been given everything by his father. We imagine the younger son’s situation at home was difficult in many ways. Yet from a material standpoint, the son goes from the family’s generosity to the world’s scarcity. He trades comfort and safety at home for the hunger, pain, and loneliness of the world.

I recognize we are at times hurt by our families. However, I know of many situations in which a family member assumes, expects, or demands financial support that no one in the “real world” would ever give. Or, we discount or deride a family member’s beliefs or priorities or choices, and in the process minimize our own hunger for close relationships and unconditional love. In short, we sometimes treat our family members worse that we would treat a stranger.

Have you ever witnessed or experienced being taken for granted by a family member? Have you seen or been affected by a sudden reversal in your business or family life — and did it cause you to appreciate what was lost?