Does birth order make a difference in the family business?

In my most recent reflection on The Parable of the Prodigal Son, I wondered how the older son might have felt as he arrived, after a long day in the field, to a celebratory party for his recently-returned reckless and irresponsible younger brother. I suggested that part of the older son’s anger might be because of the way he was told about his younger brother’s return.

The older son has a complaint to offer:

“His father came out and entreated him, but he answered his father, ‘Look, these many years I have served you, and I never disobeyed your command, yet you never gave me a young goat, that I might celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours came, who has devoured your property with prostitutes, you killed the fattened calf for him!’’’ (Luke 15:28b-30)

The older son voices what is really bugging him. All these years he’s been receptive and responsible. He’s been dutiful, helpful, and uncomplaining. He took care of things. He did what was asked, he didn’t ask for much, and he certainly didn’t ask for his inheritance early! He did what was expected of an oldest sibling.

The older son in our story is the stereotypical oldest child in theories about birth order. In the family business, it’s often, but not always, the first person who came back to the business. In their process of returning, they may have felt a sense of obligation; they were expected to return, even if they were not directly asked to return. Sometimes they weren’t even excited about returning. But their pattern of behavior is to assume a level of responsibility in the system of relationships. And while they support, supervise, and sacrifice, they can also be a bit self-righteous and smug. (Did I mention I’m the oldest sibling…?)

Have you seen such birth-order tendencies play out in your family business? How might being aware of, or discussing, these general sibling characteristics help you navigate the future?